a little bit of Christmas

A few moments from our Christmas this year.

The tree.

Unwrapping gifts.

Being silly with friends.

Opening their scooters together. 

Dressing up for the night in Bethlehem.

Squished around the table dinner. 

Trying on gifts as soon as they're opened. (and Christmas pjs made by her mum.)

The aftermath that still makes me smile.

Excited faces.

An extra large bubble bath.

Playing with the wrapping. Naturally!

Relaxing.

Playing.

Bubbles...

and trains. 

Perfect.

London

A few weeks ago we were able to spend the weekend with some of our friends who recently moved to the capital. 

Visiting London has been on my "30 before 30" list and I was keen to visit, but a little nervous about rude people, being robbed and smog. 

I was pleasantly surprised. It's so beautiful, with so much history. 

And was treated more kindly than I would have been normally. I was let on the subway, people talked to my kids on the underground and train. While I waited for Andy to help me up the stairs three other people offered to help me up. 

People are good. 

(This is me laughing at the suggestion that I get on the oh-so-high wall. I did. And it was oh-so-unglamorous)

Our gorgeous American tour guide filled us in on all the London hiostory. :) I've never felt so uncultured! 

Kim knew that different buttons on the guards uniforms meant they were from different countries, which castle was for who...

And when the changing of the guard was. Andy and I decided we'd go over with Izzy and get a better view. John and Kim volunteered to stay with the pushchairs. 

Andy and Izzy and I ran across the closed off road before the procession began and they ignored the shouting police-lady. I however cannot ignore anyone in authority, and returned to our side of the road disgraced...

Which is why said police-lady gets a less than flattering shot. There was no need to shout, I didn't know crossing was not permitted. I am from the suburbs...

It was great to see the guards and the castle though. The queen was even home...

somewhere.

The kids loved the weekend. They loved being somewhere new, seeing the Christmassy city, spending all their waking moments with their bff Jack :) 

And this little boy? Had just started toilet training the week before and was amazing! No nappies at night and no ruined sofas! Phew. 

We had a great week. 

Firsts:

Being in London.
Eating sushi.
Going on the underground.
Having thanksgiving dinner.
Being yelled at by a policewoman. 
Using a public toilet where I was escorted to my stall and was offered perfume on the way out. 

Shame only two were on my list really.

autumn walks

Puddle jumping.

Exploring by themselves.

Finding horses.

Purposely falling over.

Handsome husbands. Oh wait, just one, and he's all mine :)

Climbing.

Looking for squirrels.

Stalking dogs.

Coming to a realisation that you've been left behind. And not being happy.

Asking if they can climb every tree. Yes. Even this one. 

Hide and seek.

Being brave. Though I keep being distracted by that dad of theirs. I love how he looks after them and keeps them safe. 

Climbing to the top of "n'normous" hills.

More falling.

Coping with wellies and a coat that his stingy mum bought a size too big.

Finding, and ensuring the safety of, worms.

Oh, I don't know how that one got in there...

I love autumn walks. 

on his first day of nursery school

I made sure he had a great snack.

I soaked up our opportunities to play together. 

I took him to nursery school with a heavy heart. I'd been looking forward to having a predictable slot of time to have without any kids around. After all, it's been four years that I've had a child around me 24/7. I was quite excited at the prospect of dusting off my sewing machine and getting on top of the house work. And of course being able to do my "job" (writing articles a couple of weeks a month) during the day, rather than waiting until I'd got the kids to bed. 

But still...

My baby was leaving me. Okay, I was leaving him technically. But it was time, and a sign that he was older now. Confident, and able to be without me. 

He was SO excited to be there. He had a few tears and then I left. Staying at the door a little while to make sure he really would be okay without me for three hours. 

Then I got in the car and drove home. I only buckled myself in. I got home and didn't have anyone or anything to get out of the car. 

I got home and tried to remember a time I'd come home alone to an empty house. I couldn't think of one. 

I had a really productive afternoon of sewing, but earlier than planned I was itching to get in the car and see my baby boy. 

Who was playing outside as happy as can be.

And before I'd pulled the car out of the road, this happened:

He loves nursery school. I have mixed feelings...

misunderstandings

I had a few bad days this week. You probably know the drill. Nothing particularly awful, but crying, tantrums, fighting, a house that wont stay remotely clean, too much to do and not nearly enough energy. 

Think the joggers, hoodie and marks on the mirror speak for themselves.

I got to thinking today though, a lot of it seems to come from a misunderstanding. Sometimes my kids don't understand what I'm telling them, but the majority of the time, I just don't understand them!

Occasionally Izzy will think I'm telling her off when I'm not. Or Ethan thinks that me laughing when he grabs onto my leg in public and refuses to walk means that I'm condoning his behaviour; as opposed to me being embarrassed by my lack of ability to control my son and get him walking again.

But normally I get annoyed or upset with their behaviour, because I haven't noticed what they wanted, or have really asked for. 

Sometimes when Ethan is pushing his sister, jumping on me and emptying out all his toys he isn't playing up or being uncontrollable - it actually means that he just wants an outlet for his energy. He needs some active "boy" time.

Or that when he's not sharing or is shouting at one of his friends he has over, it's not because he's naughty, or doesn't like his friend. It's because he needs to be shown how to play and share. 

And when Izzy just will.not.stop.crying.at.every.little.thing. What she needs is her mum to cuddle her and bring her back to a happier place - not to get mad and frustrated. 

Sometimes as a parent, I need more than a few hints. I'm very much still learning. I have bad days, and I have days when I'm not sure if it's the onions making me cry at dinner, or if it's just the suckiness of the day. But, I still want to learn. To know quicker why my child behaves in a bad way, and what that really means. To be tuned in to their mood.

And sometimes I just need time off. Because being a mum is full on!