Sunday, 23 September 2012

a few good things

Izzy has been pretty good at settling at school. Though she has cried a few times when I've left her. So when she got home from school after one of these occasions I spoke to her about it: all the things she loved and looked forward to. And how if she likes all of these there's no need to cry.

She agreed, but quietly said: "Mummy, do you know why I cry? It's just because I love you so much." She said it so honestly and openly I couldn't help but squeeze her tight. Realising that she cried because she'll miss me, and not because she doesn't like school, that's actually a good thing.

I'm now working properly-ish. Andy's work needed a writer, so I am it. An extra fifteen or so hours working from home a week is a lot while balancing it with being a stay at home mum. But it feels great to be able to contribute to our savings. It makes the dream of owning our own home all the more realistic. And I'm writing! It's not always interesting, but it's something I love.

Having less free time on an evening is meaning that Andy and I are actually having more quality time together. Enjoying those precious moments when it's just the two of us has meant that I find myself wanting to be a better wife to him. I'm finding less excuses to get cross, or complain about dirty socks on the floor. I'm actually enjoying finding bits of his day while he's at work. Like Izzy's hair clip in his church shirt pocket, or his mug from the night before; which reminds me that he's getting a cold, and has me that I should make something easy to swallow for dinner. 

And though I am far from an ideal wife; I get frustrated, am short with him, forget to wash his shirts and moan that he needs a shave. But I want to remember that right now were getting better at appreciating each other. And that feels good.

Ethan is amazing me everyday. 

He is developing so fast, and I love who he is. At the play area this week a girl was crying and he stopped in his tracks to see what was wrong, then ran to me to tell me worriedly what was happening. His concern and awareness of others makes me awe at this sweet little boy I have been blessed with. From worry about how litter on the floor might have gotten there, to a little beetle he saw at the woods last week. He and Izzy were fascinated watching a beetle try again and again as it tried to climb up a small incline, worried that he might not make it into his home. 

They waited for a good ten minutes to make sure, and when they saw a rather squashed beetle on the path, they asked me to put it near the other one so it could be made better. I, of course could not refuse, though I did have to use a leaf and not my hands. I'm not yet that brave!

There is a lot weighing on my mind. Ways I should be doing better, things that aren't getting done and let's not talk about my kitchen. Things which could (and do!) cause stress. But right now, I'm going to dwell on these simple things. The things that are good and well in our little world. 


  1. You're such a supermum & wife, RhiRhi.

    I miss you so much. :(

    (Jack was asking for Ethan, Izzy, Ethan's Daddy, and Ethan's Mummy on the way to church today...again)

    1. You know that's far from true Kim! We miss you all too. Ethan asked today why Jack hasn't been at church.

  2. None of us are perfect, Rhiannon. But I think that Andy, Izzy and Ethan are lucky to have a wife and mother who is so noticing of where they are at, and so attentive to their needs. And I love how you simply tell it how it is, with no dressing it up or pretence. Such honesty is rare and beautiful.

    With much love to you and your family. xx

    1. That means so much Elaine. Though I think my over honesty is sometimes a bad thing. I'm no longer allowed to return items to shops...
      Of course, we send lonve to your ever expanding family too! :) xx