misunderstandings

I had a few bad days this week. You probably know the drill. Nothing particularly awful, but crying, tantrums, fighting, a house that wont stay remotely clean, too much to do and not nearly enough energy. 

Think the joggers, hoodie and marks on the mirror speak for themselves.

I got to thinking today though, a lot of it seems to come from a misunderstanding. Sometimes my kids don't understand what I'm telling them, but the majority of the time, I just don't understand them!

Occasionally Izzy will think I'm telling her off when I'm not. Or Ethan thinks that me laughing when he grabs onto my leg in public and refuses to walk means that I'm condoning his behaviour; as opposed to me being embarrassed by my lack of ability to control my son and get him walking again.

But normally I get annoyed or upset with their behaviour, because I haven't noticed what they wanted, or have really asked for. 

Sometimes when Ethan is pushing his sister, jumping on me and emptying out all his toys he isn't playing up or being uncontrollable - it actually means that he just wants an outlet for his energy. He needs some active "boy" time.

Or that when he's not sharing or is shouting at one of his friends he has over, it's not because he's naughty, or doesn't like his friend. It's because he needs to be shown how to play and share. 

And when Izzy just will.not.stop.crying.at.every.little.thing. What she needs is her mum to cuddle her and bring her back to a happier place - not to get mad and frustrated. 

Sometimes as a parent, I need more than a few hints. I'm very much still learning. I have bad days, and I have days when I'm not sure if it's the onions making me cry at dinner, or if it's just the suckiness of the day. But, I still want to learn. To know quicker why my child behaves in a bad way, and what that really means. To be tuned in to their mood.

And sometimes I just need time off. Because being a mum is full on!